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|Everyone’s talking about the Oscars today, and it occurred to me that they ought to have similar awards for politicians. Here then, are the winners of my first annual Political Academy Awards.|
The Tammy Faye Baker Thickest Makeup Award: Nancy Pelosi
The Sylvia Plath Award for most suicidal performance at a political convention: the Republican Party for its treatment of the Ron Paul delegates.
The Josef Goebbels Award for Excellence in Selective Editing: MSNBC
The Barry White Award for Best Score: David Petraeus (get it? score?)
The Veruca Salt I Want It Now Award: Sandra Fluke
The Robert Mugabe Award for policies most likely to reproduce the economy of Zimbabwe: Paul Krugman
The Mr. Ed Award for Best Performance by a Horse: John Kerry
The Fred Astaire Award for Best Choreography: Mitt Romney explaining the difference between Romneycare and Obamacare.
And finally, The John Barrymore Award for Best Actor in a Work of Fiction: Barack Obama promising not to raise your taxes.
Michael Isenberg is the author of Full Asylum, a novel about politics, freedom, and hospital gowns. Check it out on Amazon.com