Thursday, November 15, 2012

Top 10 Signs You’re Watching a Bad James Bond Movie

Top Ten

#10 Martini is stirred, not shaken.

#9 007 goes back to hotel room, finds Chris Christie in his bed.

#8 M has to resign after affair with Paula Broadwell.

#7 Chase scene is on Segways.

#6 Thanks to QE3, Miss Moneypenny now worth only half a penny.

#5 Villain named Ernst Stavro Boo Boo.

#4 UN Small Arms Treaty requires Bond to use a gun that just fires a flag with “Bang!” written on it.

#3 Q’s workshop staffed entirely by Oompa Loompas.

#2 Villain has evil scheme to sell health insurance that doesn’t cover contraception.

And finally…
#1 Bond says to girl, “Let’s just cuddle.”

Michael Isenberg is the author of the James Bond parody Full Asylum. Check it out on

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